Home-Centered Learning – Simple Wonders

Episode #2 | Home-Centered Learning

What makes the home an ideal learning environment? What does a home-centered education look like? Why was public education started and why were orphanages shut down?

In this episode, we’ll explore answers to these questions and discuss the big idea of home-centered education. Most importantly, I’ll share some simple strategies you can begin implementing today, no matter where your children go to school. Click on the links below to listen!

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Episode Links

Charles Loring Brace | Social Welfare History Project

The Devastating Rise of Mass Schooling | FEE Stories

American Literacy Statistics | ThinkImpact

Quotes

“If socializing with peers leads to getting along and becoming responsible members of society, the more time a child spent with her peers, the better the relating would tend to be. In actual fact, the more children spend time with one another, the less likely they are to get along and the less likely they are to fit into civilized society. If we take the socialization assumption to the extreme-to orphanage children, street children, children involved in gangs-the flaw in thinking becomes obvious. If socializing were the key to socialization, gang members and street kids would be model citizens.” (Gordon Neufeld, Hold On to Your Kids, p. 18)

“From a hundred platforms, Mann had lectured that the need for better schools was predicated upon the assumption that parents could no longer be entrusted to perform their traditional roles in moral training and that a more systematic approach with the public school was necessary. Now as a father, he fell back on the educational responsibilities of the family, hoping to make the fireside achieve for his own son what he wanted the schools to accomplish for others. (Jonathan Messerli, Horace Mann: A Biography, p. 429.

“Around the world, parents have dramatic influence on how their children learn. But Parent Teacher Association meetings are not where that learning happens. The research shows that parents who are most active in their children’s schools do not tend to raise smarter children. The real impact happens mostly at home.” (Amanda Ripley, The Smartest Kids in the World, pg213)

“Mothers Teaching in the Home” He said: “My mother understood the value of teaching her children about standards, values, and doctrine while they were young. While she was grateful to others who taught her children outside the home at either school or church, she recognized that parents are entrusted with the education of their children and, ultimately, parents must ensure that their children are being taught what their Heavenly Father would have them learn.” (L.Tom Perry, “Mother’s Teaching in the Home,” April 2010)

“While Gates is careful to not blame Roseland’s parents for the neighborhood’s crisis, he has decided that for him, at least, the most effective vehicle for improving children’s outcomes is not the school, or the church, or even the job center: it is the family. (Paul Tough, How Children Succeed, 42-43)

“Fathers and mothers, this is your work, and you only can do it. It rests with you, parents of young children, to be the saviors of society unto a thousand generations. Nothing else matters. The avocations about which people weary themselves are as foolish as child’s play compared with this one serious business of bringing up our children in advance of ourselves.” (Charlotte Mason, Parents and Children, p 3)

“The education of the children will always remain the holiest and highest of our family duties. The welfare, civilization, and culture of a people depend essentially upon the degree of success to attend the education in the house. The family principle is the point at which both religious and educational life of people centers, and about which it revolves. It is a force in comparison with which every sovereign’s command appears powerless.” (Charlotte Mason, School Education pg 96)

“…no large-scale reform is ever going to work to repair our damaged children and our damaged society until we force open the idea of “school” to include family as the main engine of education. If we use schooling to break children away from parents — and make no mistake, that has been the central function of schools since… Horace Mann announced it as the purpose of Massachusetts schools in 1850 — we’re going to continue to have the horror show we have right now.” (John Taylor Gatto, Dumbing Us Down, p. 33)

Read the Episode

In this episode we’ll discuss the big idea of a home-centered education. We’ll answer questions like why public schools were created, why the U.S. shut down orphanages, and why education needs to be centered around the home. And at the end I’ll offer some simple strategies you can begin applying today, no matter where your children attend school.

Have you ever wondered why orphanages don’t exist in the United States? Up until 150 years ago, orphaned and abandoned children in the United States were sent to institutions to live out their childhood. Some were adopted, but many were not. They were given food and shelter and lots of socialization with peers, but many failed to thrive emotionally, socially, and psychologically. Charles Loring Brace, a very religious man that was involved in humanitarian work for children, noticed that children being raised in these institutions were growing up without a conscience, moral training, only to become a strain on society. Nothing like our beloved Anne of Green Gables.

Being a very religious man, he believed that what these children were missing was a family, specifically parents, where they could learn morals and develop character. He began the difficult mission of finding homes for these children; and the Children’s Aid Society was born.

As a result, over 100,000 children were placed in homes and families where the majority of children thrived. The Children’s Aid society eventually became the Foster Care system we know today. It’s far from perfect, but its better for children’s development than institutionalized care.

What most developed countries have learned from the era of orphanages and institutions for children is that they don’t provide an environment where children learn to love and be loved, respect authority, or learn healthy social skills. I love how psychologist and author, Dr. Gordon Neufeld, explains this phenomenon:

From history we now understand that institutions and peers are not the ideal environment to learn the most important lessons and skills in life. The home and family has been, and still is, the answer for society’s problems.

To be a parent is to be a teacher. From birth you have been teaching your child the most important skills they need for life and to succeed academically. The role of a mother and teacher requires the same skills to build up children’s hearts and minds.But many parenting resources today focus mainly on behavior and psychology, and, although these are very important, they rarely instruct parents on how to be teachers.

Your children do not belong to society, the government, or even you. They are God’s children, and He has given you stewardship over them— a responsibility to teach them what He wants them to know and train them up in habits He wants them to develop. You are responsible to know WHO is teaching your children, HOW they are being taught and WHAT they are being taught. Ultimately you will be held accountable before God for who you allowed to teach your children and what they were (or were not) taught. There is a reason Heavenly Father did not send children down individually to live and learn in institutions; He established the family unit for a reason. One of those reasons is that a family structure meets a child’s most basic needs. Children thrive socially, emotionally, and psychologically when they are engaged in real, meaningful work; when they socialize with mixed-age peers; and spend ample time with loving adults.

Schools are a great resource for the family, but they were never meant to replace it.

Horace Mann, the man responsible for instituting state-run public school, did so because he believed that some parents weren’t fit to provide an education to their children and it was the government’s responsibility to step in and provide what the parents could not. Horace Mann continued educating his three children at home with no intention of sending them to the public schools he mandated for others.

Mann’s biographer Jonathan Messerli captures the irony well:

From a hundred platforms, Mann had lectured that the need for better schools was predicated upon the assumption that parents could no longer be entrusted to perform their traditional roles in moral training and that a more systematic approach with the public school was necessary. Now as a father, he fell back on the educational responsibilities of the family, hoping to make the fireside achieve for his own son what he wanted the schools to accomplish for others.

Are American public schools today providing a better moral training and education than parents? In some cases, definitely. In others, definitely not.

As of this year, 79% of Americans are literate, which leaves a staggering 21% illiterate. (Source) Public education does not create more literate people; a society that values literature creates a more literate people. And a love of literature starts in the home.

In December 2018 the previous year’s Program for International Student Assessment , or “PISA” test results were released. It tests 15-year-old students in 65 countries in science, reading, and math. Alarmingly, American students came in 13th in reading and 36th in math, far behind China, Singapore, Finland, and Korea. The US secretary of education, Arne Duncan said, “We have to see this as a wake up call.” and Tom Loveless, an education expert who was formerly at the Brookings Institution said “What surprises me is how stable U.S. performance is, the scores have always been mediocre.” Despite many attempts to raise them up, US test scores have hardly changed since the PISA began being administered,

A group of PISA researchers wanted to dig deeper into how parents affect their child’s academic success, especially PISA scores. So they sent questionnaires to parents with a variety of questions, including how much time they spent with their children; time spent volunteering at school, time spent reading to their children, etc. The hypothesis was that parents who spent more time involved in their child’s school the higher the PISA test score. After analyzing the data multiple times, they were dumbfounded: the only consistent variable between all the successful countries (even down to individual test scores) was that parents of children who scored well on the PISA spent less time volunteering at their child’s school! The researchers were confused. Wouldn’t a child do better if their parents were more involved in their school? They ran their analysis again, but came back with the same results.

After digging deeper into how these parents spent their time, they concluded that when parents do not volunteer at their child’s school they are spending that time one-on-one with their child instead. That one-on-one time is more powerful than managing fundraisers and splitting time between other children in the classroom. We’ll call this the “coach” versus “cheerleader” mentality. In general, parents of teens who did well on the PISA viewed their role as a coach and teachers as cheerleaders. They spent more time tutoring, reading, and discussing books with their child. Alternatively, teens who did not do as well on the test had parents who viewed their role as the cheerleader; they spent more time supporting the school and, consequently, had less time to spend one-on-one time with their child.

In her bestselling book The Smartest Kids in the World, Amanda Ripley leaves her readers with this powerful observation: “Around the world, parents have dramatic influence on how their children learn. But Parent Teacher Association meetings are not where that learning happens. The research shows that parents who are most active in their children’s schools do not tend to raise smarter children. The real impact happens mostly at home.” (pg213)

L. Tom Perry affirms this truth as well in a powerful talk entitled “Mothers Teaching in the Home” He said: “My mother understood the value of teaching her children about standards, values, and doctrine while they were young. While she was grateful to others who taught her children outside the home at either school or church, she recognized that parents are entrusted with the education of their children and, ultimately, parents must ensure that their children are being taught what their Heavenly Father would have them learn.” (L.Tom Perry, Mother’s Teaching in the Home)

How Children Succeed

Like Amanda Ripley, Paul Tough wanted to understand what makes children succeed in school and life. The answers to this question led him to write the book How Children Succeed. And, like Amanda Ripley, he found the secret isn’t in schools, but in the family.

One man he interviewed, Steve Gates, works on helping youth in the Roseland district outside of Chicago. The neighborhoods and schools struggle with violence, low high school graduation rate, gangs, and drugs. Steve Gates grew up there and is keenly aware of the issues families, teens, and schools face. While Gates is careful to not blame Roseland’s parents for the neighborhood’s crisis, he has decided that for him, at least, the most effective vehicle for improving children’s outcomes is not the school, or the church, or even the job center: it is the family. (How Children Succeed, 42-43)

***In the past, home-centered learning was not possible or practical for most families. Both parents worked long hours on the family farm or in factories. They did not have the knowledge or materials to educate their children. Today, however, is very different; Technology and libraries have made it easier to provide a high-quality education by allowing access to almost any book in the world, not to mention the greatest music and art, for free right in our homes. Mother’s are more educated and better prepared to teach their children than ever before. Innovation has freed women from time-consuming, labor-intensive housework that was required for the basic nurturing of the body (food, house, clothes) making it possible to spend time nurturing the mind and spirit. The difficulty now lies in resisting the temptation to use that time for less edifying pursuits.

Charlotte Mason said this to parents of her time: “Fathers and mothers, this is your work, and you only can do it. It rests with you, parents of young children, to be the saviors of society unto a thousand generations. Nothing else matters. The avocations about which people weary themselves are as foolish as child’s play compared with this one serious business of bringing up our children in advance of ourselves.” (Parents and Children, p 3) It was difficult then for parents to prioritize their time, and it is much more so for parents now with so many activities and pursuits competing for our attention. But, Miss Mason continues, “The education of the children will always remain the holiest and highest of our family duties. The welfare, civilization, and culture of a people depend essentially upon the degree of success to attend the education in the house. The family principle is the point at which both religious and educational life of people centers, and about which it revolves. It is a force in comparison with which every sovereign’s command appears powerless.” (Charlotte Mason, School Education pg 96)

In other words, we cannot expect schools and government to solve issues that start in the home. Parents are the only ones powerful enough, for good or evil, to make those changes.

As I’ve studied family systems, child development, and education for the past 12 years I’ve noticed an interesting pattern: happiness, success, and a strong moral character all start in the home. It all comes down to parenting– unconditional love, discipline, and inspiring ideas.

There are so many theories as to why the public school system is failing our children, but I think the biggest reason is that we expect way too much of the system and not enough from the family. We expect the schools to develop character in our children, teach them life-skills, and lay a broad foundation of knowledge. Like Horace Mann we believe the system is capable of replacing the family as the main engine of education and character development. We see ourselves as a support to the school, when we should really be thinking of the school as a support to the family.

John Taylor Gatto, an award winning public school teacher and author, made this powerful observation:

This is not a call to eradicate public education, or a guilt-trip to homeschool. All parents, whether they accept the responsibility or not, are their child’s primary teachers. Once we change our mindset from “my role is to support the school” to “the school’s role is to support my family” we will begin to see remarkable changes.

APPLICATION

I’ve talked a lot about why the home is important and why you should center your child’s education in the home. Now I’ll talk about the what and how because all of these big ideas won’t be helpful without some strategies to apply it. Some families may choose to educate completely at home. But for others this option just doesn’t work for their family or individual children. So here are four simple ways to make your child’s education centered in the home:

Spend quality time together. Take a serious look at how much time you spend with your individual children each day – do they spend more time with peers and other adults than with you? Look at your schedules and make time each day to learn together — read aloud a book, paint or draw, try an experiment, bake, or go on a nature walk. Even just 15 minutes alone with each child is enough to make a difference. Do you spend a lot of time each month volunteering or fundraising for your child’s school? If possible, use that time instead to spend quality time with your child. It will do more for their future success than anything else.

Say “no” to homework in elementary school. A pediatric physical therapist related this wise advice to me: she said when her children were in elementary school she told her children’s teachers that her child wouldn’t do homework. Her child devoted 7 hours of her day to schoolwork, but once she was home that time was sacred–reserved for family time and personal development. She said every one of her child’s teachers were not only ok with it, but they were thrilled. Talk to your child’s teachers. Tell them that after-school is for outdoor play, reading aloud, and learning real-life skills as a family.

Ensure your child is receiving a feast of living ideas. [ share story of Ben Carson?] Talk to your child’s teacher and get a weekly schedule. Does your child get a wide variety of subjects each week, like history, geography, music, art, science and nature study? How much time is spent on subjects each day? Each week? How is it being taught? If your child isn’t getting a “feast” at school, how will you ensure those subjects are offered at home? I have two suggestions of how to do this: create a daily family gather routine in the morning or evenings: during this time discuss scriptures, sing a song, read aloud a book, and study an artist and composer. The second, is to institute a home summer school. Spend 30-45 minutes a day learning about a topic together as a family. It could be the history and geography of a place you’ll visit that summer, or about your native plants and animals. You can find ideas and materials for both these methods on my website.

Ditch the bus. A very wise mother told me that after raising six kids there was only one thing she regretted as a mother: making her children ride the bus. She said that some of her best conversations with her kids were during the few car rides home from school. That 45 – 60 min bus ride could have been traded in for quality time with her kids, or time spent playing and being a kid.

Read Charlotte’s Words

Home Education | “Some Preliminary Considerations” Part I